A Year Later


Posting on this blog, a year later?

Who am I? What have I done? Why do I only post once a year?

Well, I'm not here to answer those questions. In fact, don't put it past me if the next time I post is in 2019. It's all on me, though, as I have been paying for this blog for the past few years but I never utilize it.

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The Cliché That is New Year's Resolutions

 Picture is of Vanessa Hudgens, my love.

Picture is of Vanessa Hudgens, my love.

Happy 2017!

I am very appreciative that 2016 is long gone because on a national level, it was probably the worst year I have ever encountered (from what I can remember of past years).

Honestly, I don't want to get into what 2016 brought for me except the fact that I did a lot of realizing. 10 points to Gryffindor if you can guess the orgin of the quote. I learned how much I have to grow and how much I have to figure out but that's what 2017 is all about...

Now, onto the resolutions.

1. Read 50 books.
At one point in my life, this would have been easy. A book a week, easy! But considering I only read about 4 books (fun read, classes don't count) last year, I'll say that aiming for 50 books in a year is like climbing Mount Everest for me. But I will not back down from this challenge! But another but I won't be so strict when it comes to keeping this resolution. I just want to find my love of reading again.

2. Journal Often.
Notice how I didn't say everyday. I can't journal everyday. I had to do it for class once and I nearly lost my shit as I wrote 40+ journal entries the day before it was due. Now I want to journal but whenever I feel like it and not being constrained with a daily limit. 

3. Write More Blog Posts.
Considering how I feel now as I type this bad boy up, I don't get why I don't blog more. It's another escape, a release that I should do more often. But I never know what to blog about. What do people care about? Do they even care what I have to say? All that jazz. But I'll try. And not only that, but photo blogs! Which brings me to...

4. Take More Photos.
This goes along with trying to stop from being so hard on myself. Take the damn pictures and love what I take. I want to carry a camera with me everywhere. Whether it be a DSLR, a 35mm, or a polaroid, or even a disposable camera. Though I love the power of the iPhone, I want to learn more with a camera.

5. Write.
When I say write, I don't mean blogs or journaling. I mean write. Write that damn script I've put off for six months, or all those novel ideas I never flesh out. I want to write more. Creative writing, if you will. I just want that.

6. Lose Weight.
HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I PUT THIS ON A RESOLUTION? Probably every year since the age of 9, sad right? But now I'm serious (how many times have I said that as well?). I've already kickstarted it, though, by losing 5 pounds already (and blasting it on every social media platform). As of right now, I won't be putting a goal weight. Yes, I know where I want to end up number wise but I'm not going to hold myself accountable if I don't meet that number. Lately, I've been feeling better than I ever have and that's only five pounds down. It's all about what I've been putting into my body and I'm just excited to continue eating this way.

And that's it for the superficial, exterior type of resolutions. As I said, I ultimately want to grow into myself and learn to love myself and everything that makes me weird and unique and all that jazz. 

What are your resolutions? Do you not care/think resolutions are pointless? Let's discuss!


21 Things in 21 Years


It seems like such a daunting age. It means you're officially an adult through and through in every continent of the world. You have or are about to graduate uni - if you went to uni - or you're in a committed relationship and suddenly, marriage is on your mind (trust me, I've seen this a lot for some reason). But, at the age of 21, it means that you still have no idea who you are. At least in my case, that is.

Knowing who you are doesn't have to come right away, I've learned that, most definitely. So, here are twenty-one lessons I've learned, things I've loved, places I adored in my twenty-one years of life (in no particular order).

  1. You don't have to know what you want just yet.
    I've always panicked at the thought of not having my life together. But it's okay if you don't. My life is just beginning and yours is too.
  2. The gym and healthy eating is not only good for your physique but for your mental health.
    I've always detested the gym but it makes me feel so much better about myself. I've learned to utilize what I have and now I'm trying to make a habit out of it.
  3. Going out with friends is a stress reliever. 
    They'll make you laugh, you'll have a good cry, and maybe you'll vent. Know that by the end you'll feel much lighter.
  4. You WILL grow throughout your life, no matter what.
    You don't realize it, but it's happening. What happened in high school now seems insignificant and what will happen tomorrow won't matter in ten years because you will have grown, changed, and learned from it.
  5. Contact family. Keep in touch with them. Don't take them for granted.
    I still have trouble with this one seeing as how I don't make those weekly phone calls, or even monthly. But I do know I have to keep trying.
  6. Friends come and go.
  7. You don't have to be friends with someone forever. I've learned to appreciate every single person I've come into contact with and learned that it's alright if they don't stay.
  8. Depression doesn't define me.
    I've never let it try to define me, but sometimes it takes over. And in those moments, it's okay if it does, but only if for a moment. It doesn't describe you as a person, but just a little chemical imbalance in your brain.
  9. Travel. Travel. Travel.
    I never knew how delicious traveling can be. If you have the opportunity, then travel will always be my number one reccomendation. Visit Santorini, Rome, London, Florence... anywhere you can, go. It will be the best thing to ever happen to you.
  10. The word 'fat' is merely a descriptive word.
    I've let that word define me most of my life. They say you are your own worst critic, and that's what I did. I critiqued myself, my body and I threw the word fat around and to myself as if it was a gun. It pierced me, ripped open old and new wounds, and the result would be a bubbling mess. But fat is used to describe something. I HAVE fat.... it doesn't have to be me.
  11. A Court of Mist and Fury
    A young adult novel by Sarah J. Maas. Practically killed me. I loved it. I'm obsessed with it. It's my new favorite book and I can't get enough of it.
  12. Gilmore Girls
    Seven seasons and I've seen it five times in my 21 years. Three times just recently. It's a timeless classic, I can tell you that because it never gets old. 
  13. Do the things you love.
    Write. Read. Photograph something. Film anything. Listen to music. Make music. Exercise. Surf. Snowboard. Create something. Solve something. Whatever it is, make time to do those things because it is beneficial to your growth and health.
  14. It's not that deep.
    Literally. Nothing is ever that deep. You'll learn that some things you shouldn't worry so much about because they won't affect you.
  15. You're not the only one with insecurities.
    I have to remember that I'm not the only one with body image issues, or self esteem issues, or anything. There are others who struggle just as bad as me, even worse.
  16. It's okay to like a boyband...and it's okay for others to like that same boyband.
    I'm mostly shamed by this one...will never live it down. Ihatehighschool.
  17. If you're in a toxic situation, leave. 
    It's the best thing to do for your mental health. I haven't mastered this one yet because there is something so daunting about confronting troubled situations.
  18. Love the fact that you're getting an education.
    Be blessed, devour everything. The knowledge you gain is forever expanding. Use it, love it, and then learn more.
  19. Believe in something. Believe in yourself.
    Believing in something, anything, even yourself, is a great anchor. Go back to it and breathe in the fact that you are here and that there is someone rooting for you... yourself.
  20. Fandoms.
    I love fandoms... Harry Potter, High School Musical, Harry Styles, Vanessa Hudgens, One Direction, Sailor Moon, Doctor Who. Immerse youself in one.
  21. Love yourself.
    Point blank. Put yourself first, it's okay if you do. Learn that loving yourself isn't narcissistic but beneficial.

It's not everything, believe me, but it's some. Every day, I am changing and every day I'm getting closer to trying to figure out what my life is worth. It's a slow journey and a long process but I'm sure it'll be worth it.

Here's to being 21. Still young and never ancient.